Best Horrible Histories Episodes Ranked

Best Horrible Histories Episodes
Image Source: IMDB

Introduction – Best Horrible Histories Episodes

Just so you know, the past is no longer a mystery, so welcome to…. Horrible Histories. Well, the best Horrible Histories episodes. And no there aren’t going to be any of the new season episodes because they just can’t compare to the OG cast. So while the old cast is now smashing it with Ghosts, why not look back at the best Horrible Histories episodes? Before I get into the list, here is some history (pardon the pun) about this TV show.

History – Best Horrible Histories Episodes

Horrible Histories first debuted on CBBC in 2009 and ran until 2022 with nine seasons. So the show is a clear take on Terry Deary’s best-selling books and follows a very strong cast of actors pulling off silly vintage sketches to show the stupid and often silly side of history. Oh, and some horrible moments as well but let’s not dwell on that. But there is a very good point about Horrible Histories teaching kids better than schools, which is both fun and funny. So without further ado, let’s get into the list of the best Horrible Histories episodes.

Best Horrible Histories Episodes – Top Ten

10. Series 1, Episode 5

Series 1 Episode 5
Image Source: Sky

Kicking off the list of the best Horrible Histories episodes is Episode 5 from Series 1. Now, this is the only time in the show’s run where there’s no song. But it had some great sketches to make up for that fact. These include Louis XI and his pig piano, Caligula going to war with the sea, William the Conqueror’s unique funeral, and horses being tried via ordeal by cake. Oh, and there’s a Bob Hale report on the Stone Age. So there’s another pro.

9. Series 1, Episode 13

Series 1 Episode 13
Image Source: BBC

Next up on the best Horrible Histories episodes is Episode 13 from Series 1. Now besides ending the series, what makes this so good? Well, the song about Victorian grave robbers and killers Burke and Hare is a good start. Other moments include a Roman Kitchen Nightmares parody, trying to sort out Cleopatra’s twisted family tree, a stupid death about Sigurd the Mighty, and the birth of the sandwich. Oh also Bob Hale’s report on the Vikings is great but then again all of his sketches are….

8. Series 1, Episode 9

Series 1 Episode 9
Image Source: Sky

Hi, I’m a Shouty Man and I’m here to tell you why this is so good! Again, sorry for the awful segue, but we have the first Shouty Man sketch. Other highlights include a Ready Steady Feast sketch about starting the Great Fire of London, a Greek Wife Swap, a Roman Gods sketch, and a Tudor Weather forecast. Oh, and how could I forget the song: It’s Not True! about terrible teachers.

7. Series 2, Episode 3

Series 2 Episode 3
Image Source: Sky

Honestly, the song here is better than the original from High School Musical and I will defend that point. Anyway, the song in question, Spartan High School Musical, is another catchy earworm of a tune that shows how insane the Spartans were at times. Other episode highlights include an I’m a Celeb parody about Christians in Nero’s Rome, the historical paramedics really taking the piss (and treacle), and a Scary Story about the Children of Woolpit. So another great episode here….

6. Series 1, Episode 1

Series 1 Episode 1
Image Source: BBC

One thing I forget about the opening episode is that it has the 4 Georges: Born 2 Rule song. So already that’s a great start as it’s one of the top ten songs in the series. Other episode highlights include old traditions in Rome, a Ready Steady Cook take on German wartime food, and a Viking video game sketch: Warrior! Viking Vs Monk. Oh, also it’s got a scary story about the Three Little Pigs and the Georgian Window Tax which is a combo I never thought I’d see. So plenty of highlights overall then.

Best Horrible Histories Episodes – Top Five

5. Series 5, Episode 1

Best Horrible Histories Episodes
Image Source: BBC

Series five of Horrible Histories was churning out great episodes all the time. Case in point is the first episode which features Rosa Parks: I sat on a bus. Not only is this song very catchy but it’s also great for teaching about civil rights. So what else makes this episode great? Well, the City Defender sketch about Archimedes, The Only Way is Hertfordshire sketch about Victorian beauty items, and Weekdays Assemble. And yes that’s to do with Saxon gods and definitely not the Avengers….

4. Series 5, Episode 4

Best Horrible Histories Episodes
Image Source: Horrible Histories TV

Did you know the Romans thought they were minted? But they aren’t rich like Crassus… Sorry for the awful segue but this has a great song: Minted. It’s about how a Roman, Crassus, was filthy rich. Anyway, other moments include an Apprentice sketch about printing, the Viking advert about living in Iceland, and Thou Hast Been Framed! Bet you can’t work out what that’s a parody of….

Best Horrible Histories Episodes – Top Three

3. Series 5, Episode 3

Best Horrible Histories Episodes
Image Source: Horrible Histories TV

Now once again this episode ranks very highly for its song about Charles Dickens. And yes more people will know the song from the parody than the fab Smiths song. Also, it bears mention that Al Murray is playing the drums in this song. So the more you know. Besides a great song, what else makes this episode great? Well, Greek come dine with me, a stupid death about Ivan the Terrible and Vlad the Impaler’s unique gardening. Oh, there’s also a Bob Hale report so that’s a big plus.

2. Series 3, Episode 10

Best Horrible Histories Episodes
Image Source: BBC

Once again this is an episode with a fantastic song: Dick Turpin, Highwayman. And yes not only is it very catchy, but it turned Mathew Baynton into an internet idol long before Thomas Thorne in Ghosts. Other moments include words from the Vikings, and a sketch about a prankster French count. Not forgetting a gong farmer sketch, and a sketch about Victorian picnic habits. So there’s a lot to love about this episode hence why it places so highly.

Top Ranking – Best Horrible Histories Episodes

1. Series 5, Episode 12

Best Horrible Histories Episodes
Image Source: Wix

And the best episode of Horrible Histories is….. the Season 5 finale and also the OG show’s finale. So why is it so good? Well firstly it’s got that song, We’re History, so that’s a clear big win for this episode. Also, it’s got lovely weatherman Bob Hale talking about the space race. And there are words from the Greeks and Rameses II trying to make his case as the other great Egyptian ruler. Besides, I bet you can’t work out who the other ruler is…. Anyway, for giving a great send-off, I couldn’t not put this episode at Number 1.

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